“The
Shellean farmer astride his Pegasusian tractor” as Gregory Corso once knighted
him passed on today, May 30 2010 to the elysian fields, a bardo of becoming.
First glance hour earlier Peter was resting with “trach” in throat in orange sheets
at the kind Vt Respite Center in Williston, Vermont ( but no extra tubes/
heroic measures for this advanced cancer on his lung!), a copy of the Songs of Saraha by his pillow, photo of
beloved Allen Ginsberg companion of many years on the wall, other Buddhist
images, iPod of music he loved including chants by Buddhist nuns, cards from
friends and out the window a bird feeder with finch and red-winged blackbirds
landing/taking off. Chuck and Judith Lief, faithful guardians and friends at
his side. He had been moved less than 48 hours earlier from intensive care at a
hospital in Boston, finally to hospice. His body we were touching we noticed
suddenly turned cold like death was in the room. We got the nurse. Judy and I
stepped out when suddenly Chuck called us back. Peter had opened his eyes.
Chuck said “It might be the last time”. By his side now, looking into his eyes
told our love, I thanked him for his presence in our lives, his poetry his care
and love for Allen, his work at
Naropa. Ah, I thought a flash of
recognition shivering through! slight movement of mouth, light coming in on his handsome face
through the window now, and Judy
singing om a hum vajra guua padma siddhi
hum in crystal voice said “don’t be afraid”. Joined in. Last breaths, one
coming late, staggered: his heart/breath stopt. Poet Christina Lovin in room with nurse
gave gentle witness who checked the clock 11:39 I think or so a.m. Earlier we’d
played recording of Peter singing his Raspberry Song with great heart-soaring yodel
and “how sweet you are”. “Make my
grave shape of heart so like a flower be free aired and handsome felt” ( “The
Snail”). Tibetan Book of the Dead
readings, in full final repose arranged with blue shirt, hands folded,
consciousness a joyful gardener sprite? no fear, no fear working its way out…
Vt
Studio Center