Whispered in the kitchen

What will it take for you people to be quiet?
Allie and I are sleeping together. I mean...
I don’t want the cake
I’m sorry, I’m going to have to ask you to leave.
Something about me hitting your butt? Stealing your phone?
Jill, you’re on fire. From the flame war.
So count your sheep, mama’s singing you to sleep...
Jack, it never gets old. What? The... chopping.
Kerry, that’s sexual harassment, and Jack
doesn’t have to take it. Kerry, don’t you realize that if my boss
took my wallet out of my pocket, I could have him fired?
Stop the double standards.
Enough nipple emails. The kitchen is not a safe place for people of certain genders.
If by certain genders, you mean both.
You are more than just a piece of meat.
These are the meatiest vegetables I’ve ever had.
I don’t feel bad eating meat, at least the lamb had a chance to run away.
The peas and carrots never had that chance, nor the mint.
They couldn’t go down with a fight.
The salad dressing recipe just...sucked.
Wasn’t there a bite taken out of that cake?

Adrienne D. Mishkin