THE DANCE
Richard Foreman
SCENE I
(In a room, with a dance floor)
(CAROL puts on record. She wears sunglasses)
CAROL
Shall we dance, Harold?
(Pause)
What's wrong?
HAROLD
I can't see who's talking.
CAROL
(Hold out arms)
Here I am
HAROLD
But there's a light streaming into my eyes from just over your head-- blinding me.
Get rid of it, please
CAROL
There's no light
HAROLD
It's blinding me.
CAROL
It must be the intense fragrance of the special rose perfume that I'm wearing today and you haven't heretofore experienced. Possible?
HAROLD
I said light,
(Covers eyes)
not perfume.
CAROL
Maybe two sensory systems are at war inside your body, Harold. (Pause)
That should make you a superior dance partner.
.
HAROLD
I don't think that follows.
CAROL
Let's try
HAROLD
You don't really believe that's possible?
CAROL
But it's your own idea, Harold.
HAROLD
Not consciously at least.
CAROL
We can test it by trying.
Let's dance.
(MUSIC fades)
HAROLD
I'm not putting ideas into your head, am I?
CAROL
Of course you are.
HAROLD
What happened to the music?
CAROL
It disappeared because you didn't take advantage of it. By dancing . But I understand that first, you wanted to rest your eyes from this hypothetical bright light.
(Pause)
Should I turn down the lights?
HAROLD
You said it was perfume.
CAROL
But you perceive it as light
HAROLD
I'd like to take a photograph , if I may?
(He has camera around neck)
CAROL
Even if your eyes hurt?
HAROLD
(Pause)
One of my unrealized dreams is to have your photograph so that I can refer to it.
CAROL
Hardly compatible with resting one's eyes, Harold.
HAROLD
The camera does the work, not me.
CAROL
You have to aim it, though.
(Pause)
Don't you believe in aiming your camera to capture the image you want?
HAROLD
I believe in that.
CAROL
So?
HAROLD
Perhaps what I anticipate is an exercise to strengthen the eyes, i.e. 'aiming'. That must be better than encouraging them to fall into slothful relaxation.
CAROL
(Extends her arms)
I'm inviting them.
Dance, Harold.
HAROLD
They are dancing.
CAROL
Just the eyes?
(He stares at her, as she moves slowly)
HAROLD
The impulse, I'll admit, is to let them gently close as you drift from left to right-- bathing them in a restful twilight, waiting . . .for the music to return and deepen the atmosphere. But that's only my imagination at work. When I do close them, after they've followed you halfway around the room, I experience a very subtle twinge of pain somewhere between the eye and brain, believe it or not, that's what it feels like. As if there's something in sight, that wants to be still more completely fulfilled. Which has something to do with why I imagined taking photographs.
CAROL
Now it's plural
HAROLD
(Frowns)
Well, it might be--
CAROL
Do you ever dance?
HAROLD
Up til now-- I haven't .
CAROL
(Pause)
Allow me to say, taking a photograph would be a superficial confrontation of a real problem.
HAROLD
How do you define real problems.
CAROL
Far be it for me -- I'm just picking up hints in which I hear YOU attempting such a definition .
HAROLD
I have difficulty, listening to myself even when I'm talking.
CAROL
(Pause)
What did you first say to me? Can you remember?
HAROLD
I can remember. I said I could not see , because the light seemed so intense. Don't you find it more than usual.
CAROL
Yes, I do.
HAROLD
Why is that.
CAROL
Whenever I rise from my chair with the expectation of being asked to dance, it's what I experience. It's a function of that particular and strange expectation of using the body in an active, yet non-productive manner.
HAROLD
I don't think of it as non-productive.
CAROL
You don't dance.
HAROLD
I watch.
CAROL
I haven't danced yet either, but I would like to.
HAROLD
You can't photograph something that's non-productive.
CAROL
It could be productive of my pleasure.
(Pause)
Isn't it productive of your pleasure?
HAROLD
That's not being productive
CAROL
How strange to say that. It means you don't understand anything about pleasure. But of course not. You don't dance.
HAROLD
You bring me to the verge of trying.
CAROL
(Holding out arms)
Well?
HAROLD
(Laughs)
It makes one think this is perhaps a room of potential revelation.
CAROL
I didn't go that far.
HAROLD
No. You didn't .
(MAURICE appears)
MAURICE
Harold? Are you ready to show what you've learned?
HAROLD
I've learned how to dance.
MAURICE
You'd better demonstrate
CAROL
One doesn't demonstrate. One dances.
MAURICE
I question whether Harold's about to do either.
CAROL
Of course he is. He's about to study his photographs, and then, on the basis of that careful study, he's about to launch into his particular and specific version of what he will call, from this moment on. . .dancing.
HAROLD
I haven't taken any photographs.
CAROL
Then take them right now, Harold. As Maurice and I begin dancing.
HAROLD
I don't see you and Maurice dancing.
CAROL
That's because you haven't done enough to encourage us.
MAURICE
Harold only believes in what's happened in the past, not the future. That's why he brought his camera.
CAROL
He could let YOU hold it for a while--
MAURICE
Harold establishes the rules of the game.
HAROLD
Does Maurice see anything unusual about the lighting this room?
MAURICE
Yes.
HAROLD
Tell us about it.
MAURICE
I can't put everything into words, Harold.
HAROLD
Then I can't believe you, and I think you're just humoring me.
MAURICE
I'd have no reason to humor you.
HAROLD
Except to keep me from flying into a rage in front of Carol. Since that rage would probably be directed against you.
CAROL
Why would you get angry at Maurice?
HAROLD
Because he was supposed to give me dancing lessons, but no progress has been made.
CAROL
I asked you to dance.
HAROLD
Asking isn't enough. You're supposed to find a way to fill me with the requisite determination, so that I can hardly resist my own impulses.
CAROL
(Looks at MAURICE)
Can he do that?
HAROLD
Who?
MAURICE
My name is Maurice.
HAROLD
What are you doing here, Maurice?
MAURICE
(Thinks)
Trespassing on your private domain, Harold.
HAROLD
No, no. My private domain is in here. (Taps his forehead) Out there where you're standing, it's Carol's private domain, and it's Maurice's private domain .
CAROL
Very well, I'll put on some music.
(She does, pause, then she and Maurice dance)
HAROLD
(Pause)
Where do you learn that dance, Maurice?
MAURICE
In town.
HAROLD
(Pause)
This town?
CAROL
Harold's having trouble seeing how we dance, because of the light. (Pause, they do a twist step)
Is that why you don't step forward to join us?
HAROLD
(Pause)
May-be.
(He exits, they stop dancing. Music stops))
MAURICE
Does Harold find you attractive?
CAROL
Yes.
MAURICE
You can tell that immediately.
CAROL
Yes
MAURICE
I wish he'd join us, but he won't of course.
CAROL
I think he will eventually.
MAURICE
No. He hasn't been able to adjust to this. . .atmosphere. He says it's the light, but really it's something else.
CAROL
What
MAURICE
I don't know.
(Pause)
Harold's a relative mystery to me.
CAROL
I can tell.
MAURICE
Can you?
CAROL
But you seem quite to accommodate.
MAURICE
(Frowns, )
I suppose I do.
CAROL
I'll make him a gift of my sunglasses--
MAURICE
You can't be that simpleminded.
CAROL
He complains about the light
MAURICE
You can't be that simpleminded.
CAROL
Right. I'm not
(Pause, smiles)
But what do YOU mean to do about the situation, exactly
MAURICE
I'm not sure we have a situation
MAURICE
Harold is a situation. We don't fully appreciate it yet--
MAURICE
--I'm willing to accept the suggestion that the rose perfume you wear attacks the sensory mechanism and inhibits the free interaction of body and mind in collaboration.
CAROL
(Holds out arms)
Let's find out.
MAURICE
I don't feel like dancing
CAROL
It was just a suggestion
MAURICE
But it was a powerful suggestion I can't understand resisting.
CAROL
You found it an irrational suggestion because there was no music backing it up.
MAURICE
The more irrational the better, Isn't that a paradox?--
CAROL
I could put on some music.
MAURICE
(Laughs)
Let's stay with the paradox.
(Arms out)
CAROL
Inviting me to dance?
MAURICE
There's no music, is there?
But the atmosphere seems conducive to gluing all kinds of contradictions into cohesive wholes--
(They go to each other, dance a bit in silence, as HAROLD appears in door)
HAROLD
Shall I keep myself halfway through the door like this?
CAROL
(Breaking from MAURICE)
Does it mean something definitive about joining us?
MAURICE
He's not up to it yet.
HAROLD
I though Maurice wasn't supposed to come into the room during my half hour?
CAROL
Did he?
(Pause)
I didn't notice, Harold, because whatever it may look like my thoughts were still obsessively concerned with your problem and I saw nothing else.
HAROLD
I see you've taken off your glasses.
CAROL
Better or worse?
MAURICE
I think Harold's in suspended animation.
HAROLD
Of course--
CAROL
I see you've gotten rid of the camera.
HAROLD
I've decided to commit myself.
CAROL
To what Harold?
(MAURICE GOES)
HAROLD
Come back, Maurice, and watch how I operate!
CAROL
He's gone, Harold.
(Music starts)
Ah. . .he's playing some music.
(As lights start to fade)
Harold-- you better make your move before it's too late.
SCENE II
(CAROL sits, below dance floor level.
HAROLD on dance floor, extends arms)
CAROL
Will you dance with me?
HAROLD
I would have thought I was making an appropriate gesture.
CAROL
It's hard to tell.
(Pause)
You're so much the center of my attention, I don't have any attention.
(Pause)
Later, maybe.
HAROLD
Later maybe what?
CAROL
He who dances last, is both light on his feet, and the one who carries his body with a weight that is most serious. I know you find that hard to follow, but that's because you keep your sense of humor separated from anything that might laugh.
HAROLD
It's called, being a good dancer.
CAROL
Is it? Everything I hear I tend to think get's twisted in the transmission.
HAROLD
Oh I never transmit, I communicate brain to brain, foot to foot, whatever it is that get's called into play.
CAROL
Which is why you're such a good dancer.
HAROLD
See? My words come back to me and not only that, I recognize them as my own. Maybe I'll sit this one out--
CAROL
This what--?
(He starts to the side, trips and falls))
CAROL
(Pause, quiet)
Crash. That was hard to miss.
HAROLD
Why is it that everything I do attracts your attention?
CAROL
I was trying to attract yours, which is why I let nothing go by unremarked.
HAROLD
You still want to dance?
CAROL
Not till I find out what kind of impression you're trying to make. I had a brother who loved dancing, but there were other aspects of his character not very commendable. Does that make you think I think that the dancing, in and of itself is necessarily commendable? Not quite-- only when it becomes the sole category available for self expression, but that happens never because we're here on such a multi-faceted planet
HAROLD
I would have said multi-faceted city
CAROL
I would have even said, in agreeing with your qualification of course, multifaceted set of circumstances such as the one's in which we find ourselves, only what happened to all the other dances who may or may not chose to dance when invited?
HAROLD
They're in different rooms, some of them getting refreshment and some of them freshening up.
CAROL
Oh? They needs lots of freshening up.
HAROLD
Some.
CAROL
And you?
(he shrugs)
And me?
HAROLD
I have to be very careful about what I say
CAROL
Very.
HAROLD
And I was.
(She holds her head)
Is something wrong?
CAROL
I'm a little dizzy. It could be age. Let's hope not.
HAROLD
It's hard to avoid, eventually. That's why I say. . .
(holds out arms)
Now's the time to dance and play.
It may not last, another day.
CAROL
Now you're trying to dance with words.
HAROLD
I am. But I don't want it to substitute
CAROL
For what
HAROLD
For the real thing, of course
CAROL
(Pause)
Would you mind if I called somebody into the room to tie your legs together? Just slightly-- I mean it wouldn't be tight, or hurt, it would just slightly restrict your movement.
HAROLD
HAROLD
My dancing ability
CAROL
If you tried to dance, yes.
HAROLD
I see. You think I've talked about it, without being certain-- I mean you aren't certain, that I will ever get to do it, actually.
CAROL
I don't analyszed my motives as carefully as you seem to. It was an idea that welled up.
HAROLD
Welled up?
CAROL
Yes. Gushed.
(Pause, smiles)
That sounds like a force of nature, doesn't it?
HAROLD
If you're in a decompression chamber, I suppose things do gush up to fill that vacuum. But my advice is, don't look to see what's happening. My advice is. .dance. Let me lead you into a dance.
CAROL
Not so fast, please.
HAROLD
Why not as fast as possible. I mean deciding to try it, whether it's fast slow, moderate or whatever.
(Someone enters and ties his feet)
CAROL
Ah, this is what I was proposing.
HAROLD
Though it was talked about I didn't one hundred per-cent expect it.
CAROL
Imagine it arriving from different directions, not in the direction you choose to feel constricted.
HAROLD
I don't follow that.
CAROL
Good. Then you arrive at freedom.
HAROLD
What?
CAROL
Freedom. Isn't that a better basis on which to begin your complicated maneuvers, Harold? I think I'm ready to dance--
HAROLD
I may have trouble, now.
CAROL
No. You are in a hypercube.
Simply stretch it by moving the whole body
Or if you'd rather-- think of it this way Harold. Loose as a goose.
HAROLD
Loose as a goose?
CAROL
Loose as a goose.
(Some dancing)
(SHE is soon dancing about him, as he gives way to the paralysis suggested by his being foot-tied. Eventually, he brings his hands up to cover his eyes. She stops dancing)
HAROLD
If what I capture, when I open my eyes, is really a new world, will you help me conceptualize it.?
CAROL
I'm no painter of new worlds, friend Harold.
HAROLD
How strange you call me that.
CAROL
Friend?
HAROLD
I'm nobody's friend if they constrict my free movement this way
.
CAROL
I know. That's why I was very, very, surprised when you asked for help.
HAROLD
Did I ?
(Uncovers eyes)
I guess I did.
CAROL
You make me feel very old when you look at me as if you've suddenly lost your zest for life, Harold. Loose as a goose?
(Blackout. Then lights up-- they are in different position. Then blackout)
SCENE III
(Harold appears on the platform, takes a pose. MAURICE watches)
HAROLD
Within me, nothing else need surface . You agree?
MAURICE
I don't know what you mean by SURFACE, Harold.
(Pause)
Do you mean nothing else has to appear on the surface of your body?
HAROLD
You can't see the surface of my body. It's totally covered, isn't it?
MAURICE
Yes. It's well covered.
HAROLD
Would you prefer it if I undressed? No. Clearly you would not. We may say,
therefore, that what I show, which is hidden, is in fact sufficient.
So. There is the postulated hidden. And there is or is not, something which emerges from that hidden. And that is, as always, the case.
(Pause)
Don't look quite so baffled, Maurice.
It's your own fault, as usual, if this manifestation. . .which in fact is very clear to you, is not clear to you at all.
MAURICE
As you of course understand, Harold, I act as if I don't know what you mean.
HAROLD
Of course.
(Pause) Shall we dance?
MAURICE
Of course. I always enjoy that.
HAROLD
(Takes deep breath)
What I mean is, if delight, sufficient unto itself, does not pour forth from you, owing directly to me and my presence which causes you that delight--
MAURICE
Oh, but it does Harold, believe me, even if the light of joy pouring forth from my eyes isn't on a wave length you seem capable of picking up on tonight.
HAROLD
Tonight? What's different about tonight from all other nights?
MAURICE
Nothing I can think of
HAROLD
Then why mention it?
MAURICE
Because it. . .came to me.
HAROLD
Oh.
(Pause).
Here , as it is manifest now. . . in my physical being--
MAURICE
I love it, when you start cranking up the mental machine just to give me anticipatory pleasure--
HAROLD
I assure you, it's my own pleasure I'm thinking of.
MAURICE
Can't I share?
HAROLD
(looks at him)
I suppose so. Where was I?
MAURICE
Cranking up.
HAROLD
Give me a better hint that that.
.MAURICE
You were being self indulgent and I was about to enjoy giving out with a small whinny of disgust.
HAROLD
Ah,
(Pause)
You turn from my celebration of self, of course, in search of. .something less physically oppressive, less tactile in its potentiality. But you are yourself in deep error, which is why you turn.
MAURICE
Don't think I'm not happy with the opportunities your presence gives me for mental and physical gyration..
HAROLD
I'm happy you say you are happy .
MAURICE
Such a repetition of 'happies'. My God--
HAROLD
It's because your words have a way of escaping me, so I tend to insist upon my own with a kind of repetitiveness which is meant to build firm foundations on which some kind of dance might eventually evolve.
MAURICE
In other words, you haven't completely given up hope.
HAROLD
Not at all
MAURICE
You might break into physical frolic at any unexpected moment.
HAROLD
But isn't that what my presence implies? Continually?
(Holding out his arms)
I tend to. . .let your words escape me.
MAURICE
That's almost impolite
HAROLD
Yes, isn't it. But I'm into something else.
MAURICE
I can't imagine what.
HAROLD
I'm crystalizing something.
MAURICE
That sounds very private, so I think I'll . .
(Starts methodically backing out)
HAROLD
Do stay and be present at my moment of crystallization, Maurice.
MAURICE
To what end?
.
HAROLD
To be definitely a participant.
MAURICE
Oh? a veritable DANCE of crystallization?
HAROLD
In all aspects. Except you don't dance.
MAURICE
(Circles HAROLD)
A solo dance of crystallization for Harold. But how I can
participate without joining the dance?
HAROLD
By giving forth with what's in your heart , Maurice.
MAURICE
I do that by dancing it, of course.
HAROLD
No. You use the old fashioned, direct method, and say simply. . .Harold,
. . .I wish that I had a sweet.
MAURICE
(Pause)
A sweet what.
HAROLD
I wish . . .that I had. . . a sweet , right here in my mouth.
MAURICE
Ah. Where the words come from.
HAROLD
A cracker.
A sweet cracker,
And then I'd swallow it, slowly, to let a kind of golden sweetness spread through my whole body.
MAURICE
And then I'd begin to dance?
HAROLD
No Maurice. The sweetness would be total illusion, in this instance.. No matter, because one man's illusion is usually sufficient unto a whole world, but in this case it does mean 'no dancing'.
MAURICE
Ah,
(Pause)
. . .not yet?
HAROLD
In this case, not yet means never
MAURICE
So for a very long time words will be my one form of self expression?
HAROLD
Definitely the case.
(Pause, smiles)
You notice the slight sarcasm? The slight sneer?
(Slaps own wrist)
A bad thing for me to allow myself, Maurice. Especially since I am ostensibly here to minister to you in particular.
MAURICE
I had no idea.
HAROLD
Of course you didn't.
MAURICE
In that case, I'd like something sweet, please.
HAROLD
Of course you would.
(Pause)
Are you thinking of a cool glass of water?
MAURICE
Not quite.
HAROLD
But I think that's exactly what you must have in mind, for in fact you don't know your own mind at all, do you?
MAURICE
How presumptuous , Harold.
HAROLD
Prove me wrong, please.
MAURICE
(Pause)
I'll have to think about it
HAROLD
Oh no, Maurice-- it must be on the instant. NOW!
(Pause. Nothing happens. Harold seems weary)
I conclude I have not the energy to help you after all, Maurice. How sad of me, and of you, to think. . .I shall be forced to return to a past way of being, in search of that energy I once had when I was in a less fine place than this fine place.. How sad.
MAURICE
I'm not asking for help.
HAROLD
I know you're not asking.
MAURICE
I'm surprised to see you still here.
HAROLD
I know that .
MAURICE
How do you imagine helping me?
HAROLD
I don't imagine anything of the sort. I let it rise in me, then I simply note its availability.
MAURICE
The fact of the matter is, in MY imagination, you're no help at all.
HAROLD
That may be true, in your imagination.
MAURICE
In fact-- I'd like something sweet!
HAROLD
I do not believe I am here to give you something sweet.
MAURICE
(Pause)
Harold. . .would you like something sweet?
HAROLD
I'd rather not be asked, but I am asked and what I tell you is always the truth. . .I would like. . .something sweet. . .
(They dance)
HAROLD
Were you ever really a good person, Maurice?
MAURICE
I think not.
HAROLD
Ah. It must make you sad to think that
MAURICE
I can see why it would make me sad, but I don't see why it should do the same to you?
HAROLD
Because I'm not as light on my feet as once upon a time
MAURICE
I see that and accept that, Harold. Long ago, it was proposed to me that I make events out of each of my thoughts. You see
the implication? Events are usually made out of actions, and it would be quite different to make events out immaterial thoughts. But I have secretly purused that goal, and therein lies the source of whatever dance I dance.
So when I am denied that dance, as you have tried to deny me, the recourse to words alone seems quite...meaningless..
Up to now I have not accepted the merely spoken as meaningful, which is perhaps why I say I have not been a good person. I.E. I don't take my own words seriously, whatever they may be and whatever they may do to others. A surprising point of view?
But having introduced you into this peculiar perspective of my own, perhaps I shall now be requalified in your eyes as a good person who wipes out sentiments both good and bad with movements of the body. A surprising notion?
HAROLD
(thinks)
Tell me.What is the first thought, in your repertoire of thoughts?.
MAURICE
That I shall make thought. . .dance, of course.
HAROLD
So thought is replaced by action, not very original I'm afraid--
MAURICE
Wrong, because while action has an inevitable aim, what dances has no aim, Harold.
HAROLD
So the first thought is as follows. .
No thought. But still a thought.
(Harold holds his head, staggers)
MAURICE
Is Harold still dancing?
(Pause)
Hard to tell , isn't it.
(Quietly)
Stay where you are please.
(Pause)
Of course. Harold's happy to see me isolated. I'm not supposed to suffer along with him while he suffers. Very well, I'll pretend I don't.
(Blackout)
SCENE IV
(CAROL reveals painting, from behind a cloth. The image of a Blakean tiger)
CAROL
Is this animal. . .a beast such as you have imagined, Harold?
HAROLD
I don't know what it means, imagined, since I feel wide awake.
CAROL
A night beast.
HAROLD
It's eyes burn into me, but it's just an image..
CAROL
Is it just an image?
HAROLD
(Pause)
It's two dimensional rather than three.
CAROL
Ah, you prefer three dimensions.
HAROLD
(Laughs)
Don't use that as an excuse to call for Maurice .
CAROL
I wouldn't do that, because when Maurice comes you seem less inclined to dance.
HAROLD
I held out my arms .
CAROL
When was that? Did you imagine that?
HAROLD
(Points to painting)
Did you imagine that?
CAROL
Ah, we swerve , Harold.
HAROLD
Such a beast makes us swerve.
CAROL
(As they both move in semi-circle)
And having swerved, once, can we extend it, so that it has no end of swerving?
HAROLD
I'm afraid your question outdistances me.
(Pause)
Forgive me if I don't take your question very seriously but take it more as a swerve than a real question
CAROL
I hope our swerve doesn't make us fall over the furniture.
HAROLD
I don't see any furniture.
(Tiger picture pivots allowing a bed to roll, and picture returns back into place)
Why is there suddenly,
furniture, entering the picture.?
CAROL
Leaving the picture.
HAROLD
Here it is. Three D.
CAROL
It's very believable.
HAROLD
I don't think I'm imagining it.
CAROL
Just suppose--
HAROLD
No thank you.
CAROL
Hear me out. Just suppose--
HAROLD
No thank you.
CAROL
(She stares at him)
SUPPOSE. . . I moved the painting of the tiger into the bed, Harold. (Harold covers his ears. Pause)
Why do you cover your ears?
HAROLD
Because I look to you to manifest things, not for explanations of things that aren't there. Just as I look at your beautiful painting for emotional truth, and then discover I'm being lied to.
CAROL
I'm not lying.
HAROLD
(Amazed she doesn't understand)
But I lie to MYSELF!
CAROL
Then stop.
HAROLD
You want me to leave?
(Pause)
Most people, staring at that painted image would say "oh, what a fine picture of some flaming beast". Or they wouldn't put it that poetically, and they'd say "Oh, a picture of a tiger."
But I say-- I don't like people making fun of me.
CAROL
I think it's only your imagination, married to my art.
HAROLD
But what's really happening when that's happening?
(HE holds out arms)
CAROL
Having completed such a picture, a true artist should leave the scene completely
(SHE goes)
HAROLD
(Pause)
A true artist, should, properly, meet death.
(Pause)
Does he?
((HE lies on the bed. Pause)
I think so
(CAROL re-enters wearing her dark glasses and carrying
HAROLD's camera)
CAROL
May I take your photograph, Harold?
(HAROLD shakes his head)
Is it because you're afraid I'll capture some aspect you'd rather not have to recognize?
HAROLD
Of course not.
CAROL
Maybe you're afraid when we develop the film, your image simply won't appear. You won't exist.
HAROLD
I'm not that easy to trick.
CAROL
It wouldn't be a trick. It would be a sign.
HAROLD
You can photograph the painting. Maybe when you develop the film the tiger won't be there, which would prove I was imagining it.
CAROL
(Pause. Aims camera)
I think I'll try that.
HAROLD
I hope you will.
(She shoots, flash goes. Pause)
CAROL
I've used up the painting, Harold. Now I have to find something else on which to exercise my abilities.
HAROLD
Not me, however.
CAROL
Still not you?
HAROLD
Not unless I turn into a tiger. But I'll be the judge of whether or not I turn into the tiger you're forced me to start imagining.
(Pause, she suddenly shots him as the camera flashes, and lights go out.
Lights come up and bed and picture are gone)
CAROL
What do you suppose happened to the picture Harold?
HAROLD
I don't know
CAROL
You take the blame I hope.
HAROLD
No.
CAROL
You take the blame for that.
HAROLD
I won't take the blame for that.
CAROL
Is that fair?
HAROLD
Oh yes, that's very fair.
(Pause)
May I have my camera back?
(She doesn't move, HAROLD calls)
Maurice?
CAROL
He won't come to your rescue, Harold.
HAROLD
I think I'll complain to Maurice that coming here in good faith, none of my expectations have been realized.
CAROL
I think Maurice will apportion the blame equally.
(MAURICE appears)
MAURICE
Why aren't you dancing, Harold?
CAROL
Time's up.
HAROLD
I feel dizzy, I'd like to lie down.
MAURICE
You don't look dizzy, Harold.
HAROLD
It's invisible, but it's there.
MAURICE
Where's the bed?
(Pause)
You can't lie down if there isn't a bed, unless you expect to lie down on the floor, but then we'd be stepping over your prone body and that would inhibit free circulation.
HAROLD
Right. There's no bed, and there's no evocative oil painting of a nocturnal beast with eyes of fire.
(MAURICE turns about, looking.)
MAURICE
You say that based on foreknowledge of such a painting, or simply observing that such a painting is not here.
(CAROL exits)
HAROLD
I observe what I observe.
MAURICE
Yes, but you spend so much of your time inside your own head, Harold, subtle and intricate as it's processes may be, that the body slowly withdraws from many gratifying possibilities.
HAROLD
That's not proved..
MAURICE
Why do you question the obvious.
(Indicates HAROLD with both hands, then turns to see CAROL entering lugging big TIGER painting)
Ah. Now I'm very perplexed.
HAROLD
Nobody blames you for being perplexed Maurice. It suits you much better than the artificial pose of authority you've been trying to adopt.
MAURICE
I have considerable authority in this room.
HAROLD
You do?
MAURICE
I do.
HAROLD
Why does this imaginary image upset a reasonable sort of person like yourself?
MAURICE
Because I'm not as reasonable as you'd like to believe-- it's just your way of trying to keep me under your control when in fact... I'm capable of much more irrational and unexpected behavior than simply turning into the image of this beast that you'd like to imagine as one of your many disguises.
HAROLD
I wear no disguises.
MAURICE
The disguise of dizziness? The disguise-- non dancer?
HAROLD
I've made myself available.
CAROL
Here's what you've been looking for Harold.
(She passes the painting to him, and he is whirling under the impact of receiving it)(He faces into the image)
MAURICE
I'm supposed to be sympathetic as I watch Harold transform himself into one of his many assumed personas, but in my humble opinion, what I'm able to identify as REALLY manifest in this little dance, is called going around in circles for nothing.
HAROLD
Correct as usual, Maurice-- just the pure pleasure of the thing!
(It's big and awkward for him)
CAROL
The painting might not yet be dry, Harold. So a bit of tiger might be rubbing off on your costume.
HAROLD
(Stops whirling) Why do you call it my costume?
CAROL
Because there wasn't any fast-drying paint.
HAROLD
(Pause)
If you'd have had it, would you have used fast drying paint?
(Pause)
It would have been a mistake.
(He moves the painting away from his body)
CAROL
It looks like nothing made a smudge.
MAURICE
So much the worst.
CAROL
For my next painting, I'll have to find extra slow-drying paint.
HAROLD
It shouldn't be hard to find.
CAROL
I haven't tried.
HAROLD
I can tell you that from experience. Not paint-buying experience, but experience in general.
MAURICE
Does Harold perceive accurately--
HAROLD
Yes.
MAURICE
Because slowly?
HAROLD
Everything in time Maurice. As opposed to you, who always rush things-
MAURICE
That's what I meant.
(Smiles)
Soon, you'll have me on the defensive.
CAROL
You feel under attack?
MAURICE
Almost.
HAROLD
So do I, and yet in other ways we seem so DIS-similar--
CAROL
Not really, but I'm working on it..
HAROLD
Making us even more dis-similar than now? How will you go about that, Carol?
CAROL
Everything in it's time. It won't require effort--
(She extends arms to dance)
HAROLD
Then I must be attacking Maurice involuntarily, from inside a part of myself with which I have no contact .
CAROL
True enough
HAROLD
That's a frightening idea. And since something in my relationship to Maurice is the source of that fear, it turns around so that you are the really hostile one, Maurice.
(He is now extending arms to Maurice)
MAURICE
That is also true.
HAROLD
And what I shall do now, is devote myself to an exploration of whatever transpires deep inside me. Hoping thereby, to travel through the full course of my agitation, to emerge, somehow, calm.
(His arms are still out. Darkness
falls. )
* * * * * * * * * *
(When the lights return, HAROLD is alone)
HAROLD
The first thing I choose to examine, is this small vial of poison.
(CAROL appears)
CAROL
Put down that poison, Harold.
HAROLD
How did you know?
CAROL
What.
HAROLD
How did you know this was poison, and is it really?
CAROL
Anything can be poison
HAROLD
Did I make this into poison?
CAROL
I believe so.
HAROLD
But why would I have done that by choice.
CAROL
Perhaps not by choice
HAROLD
Then how could it have happened.
CAROL
Something dark inside you could have made it happen, I suppose.
(Pause)
By the way. If you swallow poison, as it's taking effect, it makes you dance.
HAROLD
Not true.
CAROL
It's true
HAROLD
I've already taken it in fact.
CAROL
No you haven't
HAROLD
Remember earlier when I complained about the light, and you said it was the rose perfume you were wearing? It wasn't the rose perfume. It was poison.
CAROL
Poison you'd already taken.
HAROLD
Yes.
CAROL
You'd better get to bed.
HAROLD
I don't see a bed.
CAROL
Are you hallucinating tigers?
HAROLD
(He drinks)
No.
CAROL
It was sweet of you to bring me flowers.
(SHE disappears)
HAROLD
(Calls after her)
I though you hadn't realized--
(She comes in room with roses, he lowers his voice)
. . .they were my gift.
CAROL
(Pause)
You understand, of course, that I'm capable of rewarding you in my own very determined way.
(ENTER MAURICE with flowers. CAROL turns)
CAROL
Are those for me?
HAROLD
I have some poison here, Maurice.
CAROL
I think you should hide it, Harold.
HAROLD
Why?.
CAROL
Increase it's potency Harold. Hide it.
HAROLD
Why increase it's potency.?
MAURICE
(Pause)
Harold, have you any idea what happened to the picture of the tiger.
HAROLD
It was mental poison, so I destroyed it by ribbing it against my chest.
CAROL
(Laughs)
Oh yes, it looked like you were dancing with it.
HAROLD
(Angry)
Well I certainly was!
MAURICE
But why do you call it mental poison?
(Pause)
Ah--Was it because tigers eat people?
HAROLD
When they are aroused, yes they eat people.
MAURICE
Does aroused mean angry?
HAROLD
Yes.
MAURICE
Angry about what.
HAROLD
(Pause)
Angry about changes in their environment , both internal and external, that they cannot explain to themselves.. If an innocent lamb, for instance, enters the evironment of a tiger, the tiger cannot explain his environment to the lamb in a way that the lamb will understand. And he thereupon eats the innocent lamb. That is being . . .tiger-like. And as a result the lamb is eaten.
CAROL
The lamb might also be eaten simply, for dinner. The tiger's idea of dinner.
HAROLD
But in that case , the lamb would not be poisonous to the tiger. The lamb would be simply. . .a lamb chop. Or a leg of lamb.
MAURICE
But you're imagining a lamb that is poison just by being a lamb.
HAROLD
Yes.
MAURICE
(Pause, quietly)
My goodness.
HAROLD
So you see, I may well have poisoned myself.
(Drinks again)
Not that one can ever be absolutely certain.
(BED slides into view)
HAROLD
That's logical enough. It's late , and I'm exhausted from the mental effort I've been making to keep myself from breaking into wild and uninhibited dance like patterns of movement--
MAURICE
Plus you make have taken poison.
HAROLD
Yes, that too.
CAROL
You must be hungry and thirsty.
HAROLD
That too.
CAROL
I'll get you something non poisonous to eat and drink
(She exits)
MAURICE
Do you still complain about the light?
HAROLD
I'd like to lie down.
MAURICE
I'd think by now you were acclimated.
HAROLD
Are you trying to tell me you've turned down the light?
(Pause)
If there's a bit less illumination, it's true that perhaps I won't be so easily seen making a fool of myself.
MAURICE
I'll put on a record.
HAROLD
Please don't.
MAURICE
I'll take it off as soon as Carol comes back--
HAROLD
I'm dizzy you know, music will just make it worse.
MAURICE
You don't look dizzy.
HAROLD
Oh yes I do.
MAURICE
How can you tell? Have you taken a picture of yourself?
HAROLD
I don't even have my camera
MAURICE
Where is it
HAROLD
Carol has it.
MAURICE
I didn't see Carol with your camera.
HAROLD
Then I don't know where it is.
MAURICE
Dizzy?
HAROLD
Yes.
MAURICE
I believe you.
HAROLD
Why do you suddenly believe me?
MAURICE
Because from where I stand, I can't be sure, so I've decided to believe you.
HAROLD
(Pause)
Then move a bit.
MAURICE
How should I do that , Harold?
HAROLD
You place one foot slightly askew, and then shift your weight from one foot to the other, in a certain rhythm, letting the rest of the body compensate, seeming . . .multi-directional. I know it seems difficult-- Carol has been on the verge of doing just that, several times, but unbeknownst to her, never actually done it. But I believe you could , Maurice. You begin by putting one foot askew.
MAURICE
Do you want me to put one foot askew?
HAROLD
Yes. Please do that.
MAURICE
What happened to the tiger that was watching this?.
HAROLD
(Pause)
It's disappeared, which doesn't mean that it does not bless us both.
MAURICE
Is it well hidden?
HAROLD
On purpose, Maurice. Because it's a poisoned image, which does not mean that it's power to bless is any less powerful.
MAURICE
How can an image bless someone?
HAROLD
(Painting appears rear)
It poisons the mind. And then finally, with time the mind, through the natural course of events, frees itself from that poison. I admit I don't know how, but it always does happen.
MAURICE
You believe it always happens.
HAROLD
I suffer. . .that belief.
MAURICE
Isn't it strange how it echoes our relationship, Harold. Poisoning the mind, and then invisibly, being free. At least dreaming about it.
HAROLD
Exactly.
MAURICE
That's why I close my eyes.
HAROLD
Don't kid me, Maurice. You're eyes don't close. One never gains even a momentary respite of invisibility with you on the premises.
MAURICE
(Covers his eyes)
Look again.
HAROLD
That's cheating Maurice.
MAURICE
I can't tell if I'm cheating of course. Since I'm not seeing from your point of view.
(HAROLD suddenly falls to the floor)
I don't believe that, Harold. Does that mean I'm cheating?
(CAROL has entered)
CAROL
What happened ?
MAURICE
Harold's imitating unconsciousness.
CAROL
Shall we put him to bed?
MAURICE
Not quite yet, which isn't being cruel, but just letting Harold write his own last two three or four chapters--
(HAROLD starts to rise, ends on his feet)
--which I'm sure is his preference, because if you haven't noticed already
(they are circling HAROLD)
--Harold's definitely a man of his own mind. So we could both, if you like, offer hands for support if he choses to reach for support--
(They do)
But I wouldn't go any further than that. I'd just stay here, available--
(HAROLD slowly goes to the bed and lies down, as they keep their hands out)
waiting to see whether Harold turns to us, or succeeds in maintaining this fiction of overwhelming self-sufficiency.
(Pause)
Is he dizzy? Yes. He may be some what dizzy. He may even think it's the beginning of a dance.
SCENE V
(HAROLD IN BED. )
MAURICE
Is anything different?
(Pause)
Now? Shall we dance?
I am surprised .
(Pause)
As soon as I say "I am surprised" don't you
come back at me with something like--what surprises you Maurice? Don't you pick up my cue? Don't you follow my lead, Harold? Don't you jump in wherever I invite you to jump in.?
(Pause)
Will you won't you
will you won't you
will you won't you join the dance?
(Pause)
I may have to leave you, Harold. You may have to deal with all your friends dropping you like a hot potato, if you refuse to make the slightest gesture, the tiniest effort.
(Pause)
Last chance, Harold. I'm on my way.
(Pause)
Solo. That's what you're opting for, Harold.
(Maurice exits)
HAROLD
(Pause)
At a certain point in my life,
a great tiredness flows through me.
(Pause)
As you might well imagine,
I could not complete
even what I had heretofore deemed important tasks.
Then I slowly, arrived at the realization,
that it was perhaps a great opportunity,
rather than an occasion for despair.
(MAURICE is now peeking in)
It came to me
That perhaps , a personal message, was taking this unusual form of great physical weariness of body and soul.
The specific message, specifically implying that all I had heretofore given great importance and to which I therefore dedicated great effort,
was perhaps, only the evidence of a wasted life,
thoroughly wasted--
if effort was directed to the achievement of those goals I had previously deemed of such importance.
In other word, the implication was clear.
A new mode of behavior was to be sought.
By me.
Though what it was I could not imagine.
In other words, the tiredness was in fact , some sort of higher force operating through me,
informing , or trying to suppress, that active part of myself
that had heretofore driven me foreward into a life of relatively great accomplishment, that in fact meant NOTHING.
And my great weariness was indeed personified now
as a self-invested speakingness- to -me
warning me to turn away from that life and those values I had believed in and invested all my energies. . .
MAURICE
I couldn't help overhearing
HAROLD
That's strange. I was speaking to myself.
MAURICE
(Pause)
I confess. I heard on purpose because of my great concern
for your mental stability
HAROLD
I'm mentally stable.
MAURICE
In a prone position?
HAROLD
Quite.
MAURICE
I don't equate it with mental stability, Harold.. I call it regressive behavior.
HAROLD
Because you view it from a distorted bodily posture.
MAURICE
Neutral posture.
HAROLD
Very aggressive, Maurice, with hands on hips, at a carefully calculated distance from my bed, you view me from the center of an unvoiced and in fact un-identifiable demand, though I'm sure you consider it very identifiable. Forgive me for noticing these things.
MAURICE
It's your imagination Harold.
HAROLD
Of course it is.
(Pause)
What are you thinking-- if that's what you'd like to call it.
(Pause)
Quick now, before I decide to pack up and move at least mentally to new quarters
MAURICE
Would Harold like to take up permanent residence?
HAROLD
Harold doesn't know yet.
MAURICE
Of course he could. He likes the wallpaper, doesn't he?
HAROLD
You think he noticed?
MAURICE
Did he notice? While many other things were whirling about in his consciousness--
HAROLD
Ah, things that are whirling are things that are ephemeral
MAURICE
So he noticed the wallpaper.
HAROLD
Hum, of course, it seems to whirl also, doesn't it.
MAURICE
Does it?
HAROLD
Patterns. Whirling. Though they don't move exactly
MAURICE
So he noticed.
HAROLD
If he didn't, he'd have to move through his life with his eyes closed.
MAURICE
That would be a tragedy.
HAROLD
Not a tragedy, but an inconvenience.
MAURICE
For a dancer like Harold. Even if currently-- out of action.
HAROLD
Who said out of action--
MAURICE
How do you distinguish between tragedy and inconvenience??
HAROLD
I call a tragedy major, and an inconvenience an irritant
MAURICE
(Pause)
Shall we agree that distinctions may not hold up from a slightly different perspective.
Nevertheless, to please Harold, as we always do try, believe it or not-- Shall we re-do the wallpaper?
HAROLD
Why?
MAURICE
I thought it whirled, made you dizzy, and sent you to your bed.
HAROLD
Please don't change the wallpaper..
MAURICE
(Pause)
Does Harold want supper served to him in bed?
HAROLD
Refreshments?
MAURICE
Major refreshments are offered Harold.
HAROLD
That has an ominous ring.
MAURICE
Frightened?
HAROLD
(Pause)
If Maurice doesn't alter his tone of voice, Harold may have to turn his face to the wall
MAURICE
Into the wallpaper.
HAROLD
Yes.
MAURICE
My syllables, still dancing in your ears, Harold.
HAROLD
The hallucinatory wallpaper effectively swamps the offending syllables.
MAURICE
Hallucinations mitigating the seven deadly hungers?
HAROLD
Of course
MAURICE
I've heard stories about hungry people eating wallpaper.
I hope you're up to better than that, Harold.
HAROLD
What do you mean better?
MAURICE
(Pause)
I think the style of life in which you seem ensconced. . .might be expected to provide better than wallpaper for between time refreshment. It's true that different circumstances settle themselves on different unfortunate people, all over this fair city and its environs, and somehow they do make do , do they not, but you , and I also, Harold are we not two of the more fortunate? who with continual luck shall continue to be more fortunate, in all things from dancing partner to between times refreshments to god knows what else?
(Pause)
I would say the wallpaper that from across the room, even, speaks to you in its very specific wallpaper language says in fact, you are one of the lucky one's Harold, and promises, that through me, wallpaper shall not be what you are forced to make do with for revitalizing refreshment. Now. Down to basics. What's your . . .desire, Harold What do you think would put a little energy back in those bones, get you up out of bed, back, dare I say it, onto the. dance floor?
(Pause)
It's menus I'm trying to call forth, from the recumbent organism
HAROLD
You've succeeded in making me want to not eat, that's with my head. But of course the rest of my what you call organism, the different levels I should say of my what you call organism, continues to have the continual needs that are usual.
(Pause)
Therefore, let me eat. My selection is as follows. Just some. . . fruit and cheese, please.
MAURICE
I'll deliver it
(He goes)
HAROLD
He says I'll deliver it, and He disappears on agile feet that seem to trip over the floor as if winged. Ah. The dance of anticipation, which merely releases me into the contemplation of the food that is not here, and with just a slight mental. . .slide over the plate of consciousness, I find myself back where I truly choose to be. Facing the wallpaper. Facing the pattern, which is not a pattern I can hope to grasp and therefore remember, so that not remembering because not being able to grasp, I shall forever and forever be always able to return to its contemplation with the same dizzy enthusiasm. Hurrah for that, only if I could turn hurrah into a word with softer, less definable beginnings and endings and then, truly. . .hurrah. . .
(He has slid himself off the bed, and is standing. Maurice returns)
MAURICE
Ah, I see somebody on their feet.
HAROLD
I see somebody without the promised snack.
MAURICE
Well, I thought about it and decided it was both premature and inappropriate
HAROLD
How could it be either
MAURICE
Very simple, I made it so in my mental frame of reference.
HAROLD
I have no desire to enter your mental frame of reference, and will therefore not even ask for an elaboration.
MAURICE
What we have here, seems to be a war between mental frames of reference. You fling forth the image of a certain wallpaper--
HAROLD
Which I notice you haven't much studied?
MAURICE
I avoid it very industriously, Harold. Right now, for instance-- I'm looking in your direction. But it's you're head I'm focusing on. Not any particular feature, just the sort of haze that seems to generalize it--
HAROLD
Ah, I have a mental haze?
MAURICE
In fact yes, which makes me wonder why doesn't Harold dance, and well at that
HAROLD
But he does and well at that
MAURICE
Then I've made my first mistake
HAROLD
What was that.
MAURICE
I remembered you better in a prone position.
HAROLD
I can erase that memory
(He gets back into bed).
MAURICE
Thank you. I don't like living in a world of memory.
HAROLD
That's why you never allowed yourself to get sucked into the wallpaper like I do.
MAURICE
Shall we dance?
HAROLD
Shall we dance?
MAURICE
You've made a mistake.
HAROLD
Who's made a mistake.
MAURICE
Me. I'm seeing double..
(Pause)
Did you ever have the feeling that sometimes the whole world seems like patterned wallpaper: and you're not quite sure if that's your personal vision of paradise or something else masquerading under the vision of hell-- which is a very paper thin tissue of lies but when you decided to dance you decided to get quite beyond whatever has only a mental reality. One of you could be a lot of help in that!
HAROLD
Which one.
MAURICE
I don't know how Harold could possibly make a relevant distinction.
HAROLD
Shall we dance?
MAURICE
In a prone position?
HAROLD
Quite.
MAURICE
(Pause)
Shall we dance?
HAROLD
You've e made a mistake
MAURICE
Asking you to dance?
HAROLD
Thinking I might not. Thinking I do not.
MAURICE
To me it does appear you've rendered yourself non-participatory.
HAROLD
Not all, foolish Maurice.
I've simply been given to see, that to continue efforts as usual would be of no gain to me or to the world.
MAURICE
And you encompass my own person, in that rubric, 'the world'?
HAROLD
I was being given direct evidence that at least the FORM of previous effort on my part was effort totally misplaced.
MAURICE
Ah. So you plan a new life of total passivity?
(Pause)
Danger, Harold.
HAROLD
Quite right , Maurice.
MAURICE
You agree with me?
HAROLD
Of course I agree with you.
MAURICE
From the self-indulgence of your hospital bed-
HAROLD
It's not a hospital bed--
MAURICE
Your spiritual retreat?
HAROLD
Exactly.
MAURICE
You agree with foolish and over-excitable Maurice wiggling his fingers as he tries to imprint the very image of real danger--
HAROLD
Of course there's danger in letting such messages seize me, bodily if you will--
MAURICE
If YOU will--
HAROLD
Well I DO because I have no CHOICE but to expose myself to the danger of cutting myself loose from all that up til now has DRIVEN me. I shall no longer be driven! That's the dangerous commitment to which I am now committed.
But I readily admit
trying to
hand myself over to the forces of the new, whatever those still to emerge forces may be,
as of yet
I make no headway.
This new dance
I'm waiting to learn
does not yet seize me, does not yet lift me from this bed of indolence.
In fact, to be frank
what happens to me is that I sink not only into an intensification of inaction,
but the tiredness seems even to deepen
radically,
until I do feel myself leading a truly slothful existence,
against which my still active moral sense revolts, in principal,
Revolts against seeing myself sunk into such a passive way of life.
What's to be done?
Or, to be more truthful, where should I look for help, when I realize it has to be inside myself but inside myself I find helplessness..
MAURICE
Forgive me Harold, but the fact that you so carefully present yourself,
orchestrate yourself I might even say--
HAROLD
It's forced on me.
MAURICE
It belies your professed situation, Harold.
HAROLD
Look at me!
MAURICE
That's what I'm doing, Harold. You're making a public appearance in a very unusual condition and state of mind. It rather contradicts the notion that you are incapable of all your usual manipulations.
HAROLD
You think I chose--?
MAURICE
Where did the bed come from Harold?
HAROLD
(Pause)
I don't know where the bed came from.
MAURICE
Impossible. The statement it makes is your statement
HAROLD
(Pause)
I give myself up to statements that crystalize around me to enclose my being, but I am not the source of those statements, Maurice. When you stand before me and begin to dance, are you the source of your eccentric little dances?
MAURICE
(wiggles fingers)
Am I the source of my little wiggling fingers?
HAROLD
Of course not.
MAURICE
Of course I am. And the statement is being made that this little scene between us quite convincingly suggests you have energetic resources within you more considerable than you'd like me to believe, as you try to hypnotize me with that considerable bed.
HAROLD
There's nothing considerable about it.
MAURICE
I differ--
HAROLD
It explodes from me in a kind of spasm.
But following that, it does not extend itself like normal reality.
I mean by that simply that, now, having said my piece,
I have no desire to press further,
MAURICE
No. You count on me to press further,
HAROLD
I suppose I do.
(Maurice rises and holds out his arms)
MAURICE
Shall we dance, Harold?
HAROLD
Unfortunately, I have no great faith in your ability, Maurice.
(Maurice starts to dance by himself)
That is, I have no great faith in your ability to solve my particular problem.
Though why I should expect you to solve my problems, is I suppose, another demonstration of the absolute selfishness of my project, which you may or may not have already noted, though I doubt you notice very much that transpires outside the bounds of that little dance you've decided will hold you in good stead for the next twenty or thirty years of a lifetime, at least.
(Pause. Maurice slows to a stop, and slowly looks at HAROLD)
And now it all comes true.
No one moves, no one says a word.
I wait.
And I do understand that perhaps my only hope is by sinking deeper still into this definitely non-dance until it turns into it's other invisible self. . ..
But if that's what's expected of me. . .I worry profoundly.
Have I the raw courage, to become even more contemptible in my own eyes.
MAURICE
You're a great romantic, Harold.
HAROLD
I suppose I am.
MAURICE
Perhaps you're waiting for me to come up with some . . .unimaginable adventure in which to re-involve you totally.
Without, of course, letting you know the adventure was the invented kind.
HAROLD
Unfortunately the therapy of invented adventures is well known to me. So I say don't bother trying.
I'd immediately see through any such invention,
Second, it would simply feed my romantic tendencies
and I'm sure we both feel convinced salvation lies not in that direction.
MAURICE
Third. You're looking for salvation.
HAROLD
Did you notice, I said second, you said third, but nobody said first?
MAURICE
You're avoiding the issue--
HAROLD
I'm not avoiding the issue of salvation.
MAURICE
You're embarrassed
HAROLD
I'm not embarrassed,
though I agree
it's ridiculous to confront you of all people directly with my problem.
MAURICE
Then what's to be done?
HAROLD
(Pause)
Of course, you ask that without expecting me to answer.
MAURICE
Of course.
HAROLD
So I WILL answer.
(Pause)
For the moment, there's nothing to be done.
But after tonight,
you will no doubt look upon me somewhat. . .differently.
I mean,
there will be a subtle different in the way you manifest to my presence.
That will be unavoidable.
And who knows, perhaps that very slight alteration. . .will make some perceptible difference in your world.
Because my world, in turn,
will be differently constituted, ever so slightly.
And out of that difference, it is conceivable something may slowly grow.
(Pause)
Now Maurice, I should like you to kneel down before me.
MAURICE
We choose not to do that
HAROLD
We?
(Pause)
Who do you represent, Maurice.
MAURICE
I represent everyone to whom you might have addressed that request.
HAROLD
And everyone refuses.
MAURICE
Correct.
HAROLD
Then. I shall laboriously rise from my bed so that I,
may kneel before. . . you.
(He does, prayerful)
MAURICE
I sense that your gesture is not sincere.
HAROLD
You have no way of knowing that
MAURICE
(Pause)
May I help you back to bed.
HAROLD
Do you want to?
MAURICE
I prefer it to this.
HAROLD
(Smiles)
Then let's assume this never happened.
(Lights dim,MUSIC, rises, and they are seen dancing. Then the lights dim again)
FINAL SCENE: (Harold on bed. Alone)
HAROLD:
Ah.... This is excellent.
Relaxed, yet somehow productive--
each twitch of the mental apparatus
produceing a word resting on the brink of the lips
like a pleasure tidbit
ready to dance forward into surrounding space
soon filled with such tidbits
substituting, in a certain sense,
for pleasures more corperal perhaps--
CAROL (having appeared)
Alas--
HAROLD: (turns)
No regrets-- please.
CAROL:
I was being an echo.
HAROLD:
Not quite, since feet suffer wonderful replacement
as WORDS trip lightly from the lips, dear Carol,
into the void of greatest pleasure possible.
(She holds out her arms, steps forward, he shrinks back)
No closer, please.
May we think of this tableau, as a personal evolutionary achievement,
since --long ago, when young
I located myself at the mouth of this verbal flow,
and tried, with little success
to flood the world with a source
that seemed inexhaustable to my imagination--
until it became, alas, exhausted
because I hadn’t, til now,
the courage to feel-- well--
wonderful in my emptiness.
Or was it slightly different?
Because until now
I was never “self-locatable” in that emptiness
which was always elsewhere,
myself being separate from that
by a kind of mental mistake
which this bed
now corrects forever.
But alas, who will understand me
as I reach out
this verbal hand--
hoping for someone in the back of my head
to think to myself--
“Hello, I do understand you perfectly, Harold”
and I am content for the moment
as feet suffer wonderful replacement
because WORDS
trip lightly from lips into the void.
as we agree on a new series of definitions
to accomodate my real desire--
surfacing at last
as nothing but itself--
“in vox vocalis” as it were--
re-dancing therefore
with wooden feet no longer--
inside this spinning heart --
pure, like words of ice!
(Pause, looks at Carol)
And she whirls inside herself?
CAROL: (Pause)
I do not dance with Harold
HAROLD:
Hear my voice, of course
and automatically --dance with Harold!.
(she dances)
Which is to say--
“Resolution perfecto” for this problematic bed situation
with an almost DELERIOUS passivity, no longer problametic.
(Stops, leans forward)
She agrees of course?
CAROL:
She never agrees with Harold
(exit)
HAROLD:
Ah, yes. My sweet Carol
Ah yes. My faithful Maurice.
Ah yes. Anyone else at all
without the sou d of my inviusible voice
(Pause: soft music)
-- this will indeed have amazing ramifications.
But before these ramifications, do begin a dance
surrounding this slowly more and more congenial arena,
within which, for a quiet moment
I sink deeper into this comfortable presence
which --
called happily --
word annointed, happily--
voice blessed, happily--
this BED:
public BED:
position BED:
-- in voice- nourished imaginings
does re-populate, made MORE public--
in the same miraculous instant,
becoming even more private.
(Music rises)
In oh so excellent--
Long anticipated dancing--
rendered totally transparent,
by such a voice in full flower--
available to whomever imay be listening,
re-pleasuring all such listening
to re-install some total
SPECTRUM of truth,
inside whatever get's spoken, true or false,
because
listening to this voice,
(Carol and Maurice whirl in, dancing about the room)
--with no thought given to what it speaks--
one is happy at last, dancing
inside a listening
that is a dancing
and a dancing
and a dancing --
Forever and forever and forever and forever and forever!
(Lights fade on the dancing)
THE END
FINAL SCENE: Harold alone. In bed)
HAROLD
How excellent.
Relaxed, yet productive.
Managing to find a way in which
each twitch of the mental apparatus,
comes forward into the real world
with great simplicity and directness.
This position in bed, as powerful as an ikon,
erasable by time, no doubt,
but effective, like a dream,
from the center of which,
I speak to what I take to be the whole world,
from the center of my true being,
so relaxed that the difficulty that is usually there in speaking,
for me at least, is there no longer,
and words. . .trip lightly from my lips into the void,
though I don't really mean to call it a void since. . .
Hello there! -- Is everybody listening?
Receiving each tiny. . diphthong of indeterminate meaning,
Which is to say, that the things I say,
may indeed be of no tremendous interest,
and unconnected to the truth as others see it,
but that's not the important thing;
Because; -- we're about to agree on a new definition of truth.
And I must add before I forget what I'm not likely to forget,
that as of this very minute, surfacing,
my desire to become voice only,
is a nice resolution to this problematic bed situation,
disappearing otherwise,
--that is to say, --as this heretofore, dancable body.
So: the new truth I think I was on the verge of announcing,
The one to which I was convinced you were going to be very sympathetic...
(Smiles, calls)
Maurice?
Anybody else?
(Pause)
Ah. . .this will indeed have ramifications.
But before all the ramifications do emerge and begin dancing in front of our eyes,
and they SHALL dance,
--let me first
for a quiet moment
Just. . . savor this new truth.
And sink, even deeper, into this comfortable presence,
which you and I happily call. . .
Bed.
Public bed ,
Position of bed,
now made, in my imagining. . .
even more public
and at the same time
more private.
(Music rises, he imagines people dancing about the bed)
So one calls--
Ah, hello world!
Attention to this voice only!
And whatever it says, pure enjoyment.
And whatever it speaks-- truth or un-truth the same thing
--So what it makes you feel like. .
is simply --
Hurrah!
Hurrah finally!
There is a voice!
Which means
There is , finally
DANCING!
THE END
FINAL SCENE: Harold alone. In bed)
HAROLD
This is excellent.
I feel relaxed and yet productive.
I've managed to find a way in which each twitch of my mental apparatus, comes forward into the real world with great simplicity and directness.
There is something. . .symbolic about this position in bed.
It will no doubt wear off in time, but for now it's quite effective.
I am speaking to what I take to be the whole world, easily, and from the center of my being.
The difficulty that is usually there in speaking, for me at least, is no longer there, and the words. . .trip lightly from my lips into the void, only I don't really mean to call it a void since. . .there you all are. Receiving each tiny. . diphthong of indeterminate meaning.
Which is to say,
that
WHAT I say may be of no tremendous interest,
and may not even be connected to the truth as you see it,
but that's not the important thing, is it?
In other words, we're about to agree on a new definition of truth.
Oh, I must add before I forget what I'm not likely to forget,
that as of this very minute my desire is surfacing, to become
Nothing but a voice, which is a nice resolution to this problematic bed situation, I'm sure you'll agree?
To disappear otherwise, that is to say,
in all other ways.
So that's the new truth I think I was on the verge of announcing, was I not?
The one to which I was sure you were going to be very sympathetic.
(Smiles, calls)
Maurice?
Anybody else?
(Pause)
Ah. . .this will indeed have ramifications.
But before all the ramifications do emerge and begin dancing in front of our eyes,
and they shall,
let me first
for a quiet moment
Just. . . savor this new truth.
That is to say, just sink even deeper, into this comfortable presence,
which you and I happily call. . .
this bed.
This public bed ,
this position of bed,
which shall now be made, in my imagining. . .
even more public
though at the same time
even more private.
(Music rises, he imagines people dancing about the bed)
Hello, hello, pay attention to my voice only
Everybody Listen to this voice only. Whatever it says
just enjoy whatever that speaks. Find the truth in whatever that speaks. So that whatever is spoken, what you feel like is dancing.
And more dancing. And then. listening to that voice and whatever it speaks, you do no think, no registering at all of what is speaks-- instead, you just keep . . .dancing.
THE END
FINAL SCENE: (Harold on bed. Alone)
HAROLD:
Ah.... This is excellent.
He feels relaxed, yet productive--
as each twitch of the mental apparatus
produces a word resting on the brink of the lips
like a pleasure tidbit.
Perhaps true, alas
that such tidbits substitutue, in a certain sense, for pleasures more corperal--
CAROL (having appeared)
Alas--
HAROLD: (turns)
No regrets-- please.
CAROL:
I was being an echo.
HAROLD (turns, pause)
Your echo was a misunderstanding, my dear.
(She holds out her arms, steps forward, he holds up a hand to stop her)
Forgive me. May we think of this tableau, as a personal evolutionary achievement?
I much prefer this lonely bed, which in fact sucks sufficient energy from the gyrations orbiting it through the evening's total adventures.
Please rest assured that I am rewarded with that happy transmutation into language that bodily withdrawal-- in my case-- releases in order to cocoon me til I bleeds into consciousness itself, ready to re-emerges in faint puffs from the vicinity these agile lips.
It pleases me, dear Carol. Feet suffer wonderful replacedment, because WORDS trip lightly from lips into the void. But I don't really mean to name it void, because there YOU stand, recieving these tiny
dipthongs of indeterminate meaning.
Which is to say
that WHATEVER I say specifically
may be of no great interest, -- may not even be connected to the truth as you see it--
But we're about to agree on a new series of definitions to accomodate my real desire, surfacing at last as nothing but itself--
'in vox vocalis' as it were-- re-dancing voice,
wooden feet,
the heart of ice
--the resolution perfecto of this problematic bed situtaion with its excess of passivity-- you agree of course?
(Carol exits)
Ah. To vanish otherwise, which is to say,
in all other ways.
Perfecto veritas--
exactly the truth I feel myself on the very verge of announcing through this. . .favored organ,
The one to which I am SURE we will all henceforth be highly sympathetic.
(Pause, calls)
My dear Carol?
My beloved Maurice?
Anybody at all?
(Pause: soft music)
Ah-- this will indeed have ramifications.
But before such ramifications begin dancing about this slowly more and more congenial arena, let me for a quiet moment sink deeper into this comfortable presence
which you and I
call happily --
word annointed--
voice blessed--
this BED:
public BED:
position BED:
which now, in voice- nourished imaginings shall re-populate, and make MORE public-- while in the same miraculous instant,
even more private.
(Music rises)
Ah! This is excellent!
Long anticipated dancing
rendered totally transparent,
by this voice in full flower--
available to whoever listens,
re-pleasuring all listening to re-install the total
SPECTRUM of truth,
to whatever get's spoken, true or false,
because what one really experiences,
listening to this voice,
with no thought given to what it speaks--
one is happy at last, dancing
inside a listening
that is a dancing and a dancing and a dancing and a dancing!
(Lifts hands, others sink to floor and he laughs through music)
THE END
FINAL SCENE: (Harold on bed. Alone)
HAROLD:
Ah.... This is excellent.
Relaxed, yet somehow productive--
each twitch of the mental apparatus
produceing a word resting on the brink of the lips
like a pleasure tidbit
ready to dance forward into surrounding space
soon filled with such tidbits
substituting, in a certain sense,
for pleasures more corperal perhaps--
CAROL (having appeared)
Alas--
HAROLD: (turns)
No regrets-- please.
CAROL:
I was being an echo.
HAROLD:
Not quite, since feet suffer wonderful replacement
as WORDS trip lightly from the lips, dear Carol,
into the void of greatest pleasure possible.
(She holds out her arms, steps forward, he shrinks back)
No closer, please.
May we think of this tableau, as a personal evolutionary achievement,
since --long ago, when young
I located myself at the mouth of this verbal flow,
and tried, with little success
to flood the world with a source
that seemed inexhaustable to my imagination--
until it became, alas, exhausted
because I hadn’t, til now,
the courage to feel-- well--
wonderful in my emptiness.
Or was it slightly different?
Because until now
I was never “self-locatable” in that emptiness
which was always elsewhere,
myself being separate from that
by a kind of mental mistake
which this bed
now corrects forever.
But alas, who will understand me
as I reach out
this verbal hand--
hoping for someone in the back of my head
to think to myself--
“Hello, I do understand you perfectly, Harold”
and I am content for the moment
as feet suffer wonderful replacement
because WORDS
trip lightly from lips into the void.
as we agree on a new series of definitions
to accomodate my real desire--
surfacing at last
as nothing but itself--
“in vox vocalis” as it were--
re-dancing therefore
with wooden feet no longer--
inside this spinning heart --
pure, like words of ice!
(Pause, looks at Carol)
And she whirls inside herself?
CAROL: (Pause)
I do not dance with Harold
HAROLD:
Hear my voice, of course
and automatically --dance with Harold!.
(she dances)
Which is to say--
“Resolution perfecto” for this problematic bed situation
with an almost DELERIOUS passivity, no longer problametic.
(Stops, leans forward)
She agrees of course?
CAROL:
She never agrees with Harold
(exit)
HAROLD:
Ah, yes. My sweet Carol
Ah yes. My faithful Maurice.
Ah yes. Anyone else at all
without the sou d of my inviusible voice
(Pause: soft music)
-- this will indeed have amazing ramifications.
But before these ramifications, do begin a dance
surrounding this slowly more and more congenial arena,
within which, for a quiet moment
I sink deeper into this comfortable presence
which --
called happily --
word annointed, happily--
voice blessed, happily--
this BED:
public BED:
position BED:
-- in voice- nourished imaginings
does re-populate, made MORE public--
in the same miraculous instant,
becoming even more private.
(Music rises)
In oh so excellent--
Long anticipated dancing--
rendered totally transparent,
by such a voice in full flower--
available to whomever imay be listening,
re-pleasuring all such listening
to re-install some total
SPECTRUM of truth,
inside whatever get's spoken, true or false,
because
listening to this voice,
(Carol and Maurice whirl in, dancing about the room)
--with no thought given to what it speaks--
one is happy at last, dancing
inside a listening
that is a dancing
and a dancing
and a dancing --
Forever and forever and forever and forever and forever!
(Lights fade on the dancing)
THE END