by Hannah

comments by:


For those trying this at home, remember:
the china doll stylist won't believe you.
Show her the tomboy, short-cut in the slick magazine.
Grin, as if a yellow smile pointed at mascara-lined eyes
could win you this woman's favors.

Remember too the intimacy of shampoo:
fingertips to scalp, a blending of oils and water.
You feel vaguely like a cigarette
as you are led, dripping, to the metal chair.                                  

You carry regret in your purse like birth control,
but wisely keep it pocketed as the fragrant
foot-long licks of brown fall to the floor.
It's probably best to imagine you feel lighter as you listen
to a conversation between dead cells and sterling scissors.

Promise you won't look until she's finished,
but run your fingers, wet along a wet scalp,
as she turns to choose a bottle of pomade:
the length and texture mutable and loose,
like love half done.                                                           

Accourding to Kirsten Thorpe:

Date: Thu, 25 Feb 1999 21:09:09 -0500 (EST)
From: (Kirsten L Thorpe)         


i love the first two stanzas, especially the "short-cut in the slick
magazine" and the "intimacy of shampoo." i also like the tone, the "For
those trying this at home" and, i think you lose some of that in the last
two stanzas starting with "it's probably best to imagine..", it becomes a
little more narrative than i want. i think maybe you could shorten those
last two lines of the third stanza, and push to maintain the sharp
immagery, and especially, especially don't cut out the take home
message.  over all, though, this starts it rollin. cool.